EBOOK or PDF Night of the Crabs ✓ Guy N. Smith
A FEW PRELIMINARIES FOR THE DISCERNING BIBLIOPHILE1 This book is called Night of the Crabs 2 This book is NOT called An Meaningful Exploration into the Depth and Meaning of Classic American Literature3 This book s cover shows a iganto ill tempered CRABosaurus sporting a stool dropping don t come hither look in its KaBOOM!: One Entrepreneur's Quest to Build Community SAVE PLAY! glowing red eyes4 The publishers of this book chose for its marketing tag line to be In The Tradition of RatsThe above should clue you that we are dealing with a certain uality of plot complexity intelligent dialogue and deft characterization The same standard of uality that made the films of Ed Wood and Roger Corman so famous andave Mystery Science Theater 3000 the material to become the reatest show ever With that in mind reading this book was just like watching one of those 1950 s monster movies that they used show on Saturday mornings You know the ones you used to watch through one bloodshot eye while you tried in vain to reconstruct the previous evening s Teuila fueled round of misdemeanors Well this book would ualify as one of the better uality bad movies and I had a TON of FUN with it Smith knows the kind of book he is writing and keeps the pace brisk by wasting no time on minutia like plot character development or dialogue He does however leave room for healthy amounts of hokey campy and corny and I spent much of the story with an ear to ear rin on my face I thoroughly enjoyed reading it and plan on reading at least one of the seuels to see if the magic can continue Of course be advised that you will be cheering for the CRABzillas in this story as the human inhabitants are so hopelessly inept that by the time they et ripped into ory chunks of stupidity you re just sighing thankfully that they ve been flushed out of the human Who on God's Earth do you 'think' you are?: A true story about TRANSCENDING the ILLUSION of SEPARATION gene pool before they had a chance to breed That is of course except for our intrepid hero Professor Cliff Davenport whoseenius and MacGyver like ability to sueeze out of tight situations and develop on the fly solutions to seemingly unsolvable problems is a roan inducing joy to behold And that man can rap too Here is a sample of a few of my favorite uotes from old Professor Problem solver In trying to describe the invulnerability of the Crabs to the inept military leaders the Prof says You haven t seen these monsters If you had you d know what I mean I d have to see em blown to smithereens with my own eyes before I d believe they re not invincible This course is a classic restatement of the scientific method Later upon seeing leader of the Crabs oh yes Crabbies ot themselves a head honcho the Professor curses King CrabSee the Devil Twice as big as the others He s cunning than any human being Somehow he s Mesagerul got them out there hiding But how Only a brilliant scientific mind could intuit such sly cunning on the part of King Crab by simply looking at him To top off the wonderful schlockyoodness that is Night of the Crabs I must. Holidaymakers on the Welsh coast bask peacefully in the summer sunshine blissfully unaware of the huge and evi.
Guy N. Smith ☆ 0 read & downloadT of WalesThe stupid military officers who discount the scientific advice all we have a Judy Blume: Fearless Storyteller for Teens great military andreat Weapons How We Possibly How could we possibly book reminded me of such classics as Earth vs the Spider It Came From Beneath the Sea Them and even a little of Island of Terror I will definite The iant killer crab book to end all killer crab books Guy N Smith is I m afraid to say a mostly forgotten monster scribbling legend Night of the Crabs is the start of one of the wildest monster series ever written So much fun So much death I loved it Let me preface this by saying that this book was a blast So why am I only rating it 3 stars you ask Even though this book was a lot of fun it s not exactly well written I wasn t expecting horror literature so that was okay with "ME I M NOT SURE IF IT WAS AN "I m not sure if it was an issue or if the original text was messed up but there are a lot of weird things oing on in the Kindle edition with exclamation points capitalized letters in the middle of sentences and other things like thatThis book was written in the 70 s so I had some issues with the views on women but I understand this book is a product of its time so that s cool Other than those issues this book was a What Am I Doing with My Life?: And other late night internet searches answered by the great philosophers great creature feature Lots of bloody showdowns between the crabs especially the KING crab and mankind Man usually coming out the loser again and again All kinds of bloody disasters and almost non stop action other than the main characters falling in love within like 3 pages which made this a uick read You know every once in a while I need me some cheesy horror Not everything can be The Haunting of Hill House Sometimes I just want to be entertained without thinking too much If you re in need or in the mood for the Sharknado of books this is the one for youRecommended for fans of cheesy horror creature feature fun The first of Guy N Smith s killer crab books and still the champion Short and fast moving 1970s style paperback horror novel featuringiant crabs Jimmy: The Terrorist gratuitous sex and outdated sexism The downside Poor dialogue undeveloped characters and nonsensical action Even for thisenre this novel is pretty crappy The upside It s kind of fun you know what you re How to Live the James Bond Lifestyle: The Complete Seminar getting into when you pick it up But I just can t inood conscience More scary stories for sleep-overs give it than one star Forward By JF Gonzalez Introduction by Guy N Smith This may have started the Crab migration Today we have Clickers and Crustations by other authors This book is as close to a 50 s horror movie as you canet How can you not love a bunch of hungry Crabs out for a uick bite I purchased this book from the author at his Black Hill Books bookstore where the last time I looked he had almost fourty of his books for sale which he will ladly sign if asked Night of the CrabsOctober 18 2014 to October 19 2014Group Read Horror Readers Review theme Since when is sex important than Giant Crabs Oh oodness racious this is the most fun I m had reading a A series of apparent drowningsAnd when the screaming stops the crunching of bone and munching of flesh begins. Mention the obligatory love affair between Professor Hero and his beautiful one dimensional bubble headed love interest when she speaks you can actually hear an echo This is the kind of torrid smoky romance that will cause readers to re examine their own pathetic lives and dream of finding someone who can make them this happy How often if ever in your own life can you honestly say you have felt this much His loins were fully charged with emotion and he would dearly love to have taken her Not only beautifully said but it really makes you think doesn t it Bottom line if the title the cover and above uotes make you think you would like this odds are you will Me "I HAD A LOT OF FUN "had a lot of fun it 30 stars GIANT EVIL CRABS INVADE WALESThis is Guy N SmithI can t tell if he s trying to be serious here but he s a very seriousprolific author who seems to be oing Dont You Dare Give Up gangbusters with the ebook rights to his out of print pulp paperbacksSo is he a sadly underrated British writer whose work deserves wider literary acclaim You be the judge I don I ve noticed something really special about reading the Giant Crabs series by Guy N Smith out of order it doesn t matter It means nothing Nobody ever learns a fucking thing about these crabs and passes it to the next book Even the main character in Night of the Crabs the first of the crabs books shows up in the second crabs book and really has no information to offer Exceptuns don t work and they come out when the moon is full but anyone who knows anything about crabs knows that The thing I will say about Night of the Crabs is that it is both the most titillating Crabs book that I ve read so far and also the most idiotic Case in point the lead character Cliff Davenport is an expert on undersea botany he knows about plants AND sea animals Also *his nephew is coincidentally the first victim of the iant crabs He flies out to investigate his nephew *nephew is coincidentally the first victim of the iant crabs He flies out to investigate his nephew disappearance and lucky for the book sees iant crab claws everywhere and can identify them But that s not the best part The best part is the weird sex Because Guy N Smith writes sex scenes like a twelve year old who s never seen a naked lady before The first time Davenport has sex with his lovely new irlfriend Smith writes the followingHer fingers were active Cliff felt that
thrilling sensation of his zip being pulled down her fingers roping inside the open vent and thensensation of his zip being pulled down her fingers roping inside the open vent and then coolness of the night air on his warm moistnessHIS WARM MOISTNESSI can say no I have several Giant Crabs books to o I absolutely loved this book It s not very long but it took me back to my childhood watching reat classic American and British monster movies I also watched a lot of Japanese ones too but this book is in the vein of the American and British onesThe The Interior Landscape: Love Poems from a Classical Tamil Anthology giant creatures that start attacking peopleThe scientist who is the only one that understands the dangerTheirlfriend who stand by himThe isolated location a small island off the coas. L army of Longevity, Senescence, and the Genome giant crustaceans that lurk in the dark off shore waterswatching waitingwhile the police investigate.